


Don't Mess With Me

by Antarctica_or_bust



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Awesome Dís, BAMF Dís, Battle of Five Armies Fix-It, Crack, Dís' theme song, Gen, Song Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-30
Updated: 2014-08-30
Packaged: 2018-02-15 11:36:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2227566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antarctica_or_bust/pseuds/Antarctica_or_bust
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every Durin needs a theme song, especially Dís.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Mess With Me

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [the better part of valor](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1119950) by [Antarctica_or_bust](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antarctica_or_bust/pseuds/Antarctica_or_bust). 



> Is it weird to have things inspired by my own fics?  
> For Kittycombs who thought that Dís needed a theme song; this is what my very strange brain came up with. To the tune of [Don't Mess With Me](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMeWTcPOLGg)

Every bard will sing  
Of Thorin's majesty  
Like he's some mighty king  
Who could have done it without me  
  
No, my brother is a fool  
Without two wits to make a plan  
His mind obsessed with jewels  
Just like every other man  
  
Truly his stupidity can hardly be believed  
He and my two sons are gonna be the death of me  
  
See my crown, I am a queen  
Bow to my overwhelming majesty  
For I am fierce, a Durin born  
And I will see you go extinct  
  
So don't mess with me  
You'll lose your head  
Don't mess with me  
  
I could have killed that dragon  
Helped my brother with his task  
But instead he just went running off  
And now I'm sharpening my axe  
Because my sons went with him  
Their fool heads filled with fluff  
So no one better kill them before I reach Erebor  
  
Touch my family and you'll eat steel  
Because I am what danger learns to fear  
  
See my crown, I am a queen  
Bow to my overwhelming majesty  
For I am fierce, a Durin born  
And I will see you go extinct  
  
So don't mess with me  
I'll see you dead  
Don't mess with me  
  
'Cause all your heads are gonna roll  
If you dare to block my goal  
So if you want survival  
Kneel on my arrival  
You'll kiss the ground before I'm done  
  
No one can stop me  
And if you try I'll take you out  
Because I am that awesome  
Badass without a doubt  
  
See my crown, I am a queen  
Bow to my overwhelming majesty  
For I am fierce, a Durin born  
And I will see you go extinct  
  
So don't mess with me  
You'll lose your head  
Don't mess with mine  
I'll see you dead  
Don't mess with Dís  
I'm Azog's dread  
Don't mess with me  
  


  
_Finis_

 


End file.
